Mindful Practices for Transforming your Life

What if you could transform your life by simply renewing your mind? In our latest episode, I encourage a journey toward personal and spiritual growth, rooted in daily renewal and self-compassion. I unravel the profound teachings of Lamentations 3:22 and Romans 12:1-2, inviting you to embrace God's mercy and compassion as a foundation for self-forgiveness. This episode underscores the power of aligning your thoughts and behaviors with divine guidance and how fostering a personal relationship with Christ can lead to true transformation. Learn how living apart from worldly influences can enhance your spiritual, physical, and financial well-being.

Moreover, discover practical techniques to manage negative thoughts and improve mental clarity. I introduce thought defusion which is a technique from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, offering creative exercises to redirect your attention away from anxiety-inducing patterns. From visualizations to verbal techniques, I guide you through strategies that encourage mindfulness and self-awareness. Additionally, I explore effective communication in relationships, emphasizing the importance of curiosity and courage in expressing your thoughts and feelings. By the end of this episode, you'll be equipped with tools to approach each day with gratitude and joy, transforming not just your mind, but your world.

Chapters

• 0:00 Transforming Your Mind and World
• 11:10 Thought Defusion Techniques
• 21:32 Navigating Communication Through Curiosity

Transcript

Tyra: 0:41

Hello there. How are y'all doing on this wonderful day that the Lord has made? I pray you're choosing to rejoice and be glad in it. Also, be grateful for another day. It is another day that you are singsing, so be grateful. Take the opportunity to create joy, peace and love. Also, be merciful, because God's mercy is new every day that you see.

Tyra: 1:09

Lamentations 3.22 says through the Lord's mercy, we are not consumed, because his compassion fail not. They are new every morning. Great is your faithfulness, praise Jesus, hallelujah. Great is your faithfulness, praise Jesus, hallelujah. That's letting us know that God's mercy is new every morning and he's always showing compassion. So that means that we ought to be compassionate toward ourselves as well as being merciful. So if there's something that is on your heart that you have not forgiven yourself for, I want you to take this day to forgive yourself. Show yourself some mercy.

Tyra: 1:57

Your past does not define who you are. Who you are today is a son or a daughter of God. You are no longer doing those things that you used to do, but just in case you are doing those things that you used to do, I want you to take this opportunity to make a decision to transform, because you first have to make a decision, to do the right thing, to transform your life. And so that brings me to the quote of the day, because this quote says that to change your thoughts, you change your world, and that's from Norman Vincent Peale. So if you are trying to transform, that means you have to change your thoughts. So, as I'm thinking about this quote change your thoughts, you change your world. I know that it's parallel to a scripture in the Bible and of course I had just said it being transformed by the renewing of your mind. But let's read what Romans 12 says and do not wait a minute, hold up, it says and.

Tyra: 3:13

So we're going to have to go back and read verse 1. I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice holy acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service, and do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. So Paul is saying in verse 1 that he beseeched us, by the mercies of God, that we do present our bodies a living sacrifice holy acceptable to God. So that's talking about our physical body. Verse 1 is so that's talking about our physical body. Verse 1 is and he's also saying that it is our reasonable service to present our bodies unto God holy and acceptable. How we make that happen is through the mind.

Tyra: 4:23

So you have to renew your mind in order to be transformed, in order to not conform to this world. You have to renew your mind. That means you have to get a different perspective and as you grow that perspective, you also grow your beliefs, and as your beliefs grow, your behaviors change. So that's where the transformation takes place, because we are not to be conformed to this world. Conformed means to come into alignment with or agree with. We are not in alignment with what this world is saying, that, how we're supposed to, or even what, how we think we supposed to behave ourselves.

Tyra: 5:08

God has already given us the truth, the manual, basically, which is the Bible, on how we are to present ourselves as believers. So we learn that by learning his word, by reading his word, by also developing a relationship with God, because as you develop a relationship with God, you will have another perspective, formulating in your mind, as well as experience what is going on. Because as you experience your relationship with Christ, you will be transformed, especially after an encounter with Jesus Christ. You know what I mean. Ooh, bless the Lord. Because I'm just thinking about my own experience, because I was able, or I am, I am able to prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God, because I made a decision to have a personal relationship with Christ. And as I develop a personal relationship with Christ, I change my way of thinking by reading the Word of God, because through that I'm able to know who God is and who he is as my Father, and also who the Holy Spirit is as my Comforter. So through all that, you're able to be transformed by the renewing of your mind, because it's through my mind first, where I made a decision and then I did the work, and here I am transformed. So it can happen the same way for you as you change your thoughts.

Tyra: 7:06

As you change your thoughts, you change your world. So any type of thing that's going on in your life or life you do want to change, or what I mean by life, that means your spiritual life, your physical life, your psychological life, that's dealing with the soul, your occupational life, your financial life. You know financial life, all that are lives you know, and it is a part of who we are as a human being. So, as you are trying to figure out how to transform these lives, you have to change your way of thinking. You have to get another perspective, because there's always another perspective on how to think about something it really is. Our worlds are totally different. Believers of Jesus Christ's world, they are totally different than the world that's out there. And as believers, we are always striving to have that good and acceptable perfect will of God by the renewing of our minds. That means you're always keeping that mind sharp, and the only way you do that is by knowing God's word and knowing who he is, and not just knowing who he is to you, but having a personal relationship with Christ.

Tyra: 9:37

We are responsible for changing our own thoughts. Okay, no one else can do this for us. We can only do it ourselves. We have to make the decision to change our way of thinking. So, just like this quote says, change your thoughts, you change your world.

Tyra: 10:00

So let's get into our episode for today. Last week's episode was about the first step, that means, you know, to letting go, the first step to letting go. That means that we have to first make a decision, first make your decision to let it go, and then we get to the second step of doing the work of letting it go, because you can't just plan something, you can't just say something. You can't just plan something, you can't just say something, you can't just make a decision. Once you make that decision, a conscious decision, most definitely you're going to start doing the work. We have to start executing these plans and thoughts and these decisions that we're saying that we're going to do something. Following through is basically what it is, but the work is so important because you do have to do the work. The work is so important because you do have to do the work. If you want the world and your life to change, you're going to have to do the work.

Tyra: 11:10

So there's a therapeutic technique called thought defusion. It is developed by the therapy of acceptance and commitment. This work is simply shifting your energy, your attention, away from what you are stuck on as far as that thought you're having. That way of thinking, you know, is really not good, because when you get stuck on something and you have a thought that keeps repeating itself in your head. You can dictate your moods and your emotions. So some people get overwhelmed, some people get anxious, some people get depressed, and it's because of the thought that keeps repetitively going on and on and on. That keep repetitively going on and on and on, and we do not suppose to be at that point of the thinking process, because thinking is good it really is. It's good to sit down and process your thoughts, but you do have to go through the process of thinking. You can't just be on this loop, over and over and over, thinking the same thing, because it is going to dictate your muse.

Tyra: 12:29

So, with that being said, there is a technique called thought defusion. That means that you're going to defuse the thought or detach away from the thought that you can't seem to get away from. And there are eight ways to defuse your thoughts according to this skill. And you can find these activities, these skills, these things that you can practice at home. You can find them on therapistaid dot com. This is a website that I love to go to when I'm helping my clients, you can go on there and look up any situation that you're trying to overcome, and they will give you tools that you can try to see what works. That is at therapististAid dot com.

Tyra: 13:23

So with these activities, I want you to understand that you have to find what works for you. So I'm just going to tell how you can, you know, let go of thoughts that you can't seem to get past. So you can use thought defusion when you feel triggered, when your thoughts are one-sided as well as when you are lost in thoughts, when your thoughts are one-sided as well as when you are lost in thoughts. So let's say, for example, your thoughts spike, your anxiety or your moods get even worse, or you just tend to be fixated on a thought and can't seem to start focusing on other things, can't seem to start focusing on other things, or you get preoccupied and not present to what's happening at the moment. So here are eight activities that you can try, and I'm going to go through these eight so that you can see which one will work for you.

Tyra: 14:45

So the first one is put your thoughts on clouds. That means that you're going to put a thought on a cloud and you're just going to watch the cloud go away, drift away right into the sky, and you're going to remind yourself that these clouds come and go, they don't have any substance. They don't do anything for you. So you're just putting the thought on the cloud and you're visualizing it drift away into the sky. The second one is file your thoughts away. You visualize folders with labels for types of thinking such as predicting, regretting, comparing, doubting and so on. You can even add shame, guilt, but any type of label that is on that type of thinking that you're thinking. Just visualize it and then you're going to bring attention to that thought and file it into that corresponding folder. The third one is click the X button. Thoughts can crowd your mind like dozens of browser windows on your computer. Imagine closing the windows by clicking the X on each of these thoughts that you're having and you're just going to watch it disappear one by one. Now, all of these activities are basically visualizing, imagining things, especially these three.

Tyra: 16:11

But the fourth one is you're going to have to verbalize the thinking process. You can start your sentence off by saying I'm having the thought that, for example, I'm having the thought that so-and-so, so-and-so don't like me. If I have a thought that somebody don't like me, I need to process that thought as if it's just a thought, the process of thought as if it's just a thought. It's not a fact until I go out there and find the evidence for this thought that I'm having. So if I'm having this thought, I need to go out there and seek it. Curiosity is a very good thing to have, because as you become curious about something, you go out there and seek the answer. So if I'm having a thought about somebody don't like me, I'm going to have to go out and ask that person why they don't like me or why I think they don't like me. Because when I go over there and talk to that person, I should say I'm having this feeling that you don't like me. Are we okay? Okay, are we good? Is there anything that you want to tell me? You know, because it's good to have that curiosity so I can seek answers to the thought that I'm having instead of me going down a rabbit hole with this thought. But curiosity also comes with courage, because you do have to have the courage to walk over there and ask the question. All right, so let's get to the first one.

Tyra: 17:49

Use a silly voice, write down your upsetting thought and then read it out loud 10 times in a silly voice. Try impersonating a cartoon character or a favorite actor. The more ridiculous, the better. Name the story. Think of repetitive thoughts as familiar stories. Pay attention to how often they recur. You might spot the I am a failure story. The no one likes me story. Or my life is horrible story you get the idea. Or I'm not enough story. You're just naming the story because it's basically letting you know that these are not facts, these are just stories. These are just stories, these are just thoughts. But I don't want you to just be naming these stories and just thinking of these thoughts. I want you to replace those thoughts. But it's good to be aware of the type of thoughts that you are having.

Tyra: 18:54

All right, the seventh one screen your thoughts. Imagine your thoughts projected onto a large movie screen. You're just sitting in the background. You're just watching the movie on phone. With all these thoughts that you have, can you observe the movie without getting lost in it? The next one, the last one zoom out when you're filled with a thought. Picture yourself rising high above the earth and notice how tiny your worries look from space. Does your triggering thought feel as significant from this distance? As you zoom yourself going up into space, you're visualizing this, of course. As you zoom yourself going up into space, you're visualizing this, of course, you are noticing that the worries and the thoughts, how they look from the space as you're high up there in the air, does the triggering thought feel significant from this distance? So here are eight activities.

Tyra: 19:56

It would be great if you could try them all, and the reason why I say that is because you do want to find out if either one of these will work for you, and if they don't work for you, then create your own. Find something that you can use as far as visualizing and talking out, processing your thoughts so that they do not dictate your mood, because it is your responsibility to be in control of your thoughts and your feelings. If you find yourself being triggered by your thoughts, it's good to process them, but I would like for you to do number four, to say I'm having these thoughts that it's XYZ, because the reason why I say that is because it's a good way to process your thinking, because you are letting yourself know that, hey, this is only a thought, this is just something that is simply in my head and I have to find the evidence. I have to go out there and find the evidence. It's my responsibility to find the evidence. I mean a lot of people do it too. They sit there and they make these statements when they're having conversations with people, especially those they have conflict with, and the first thing we do is make statements.

Tyra: 21:32

But before you go and make those statements to that other person, it's good to process the thinking first, where you're thinking about what it is that is affecting you, about what the other person is doing, because, as you are sitting there thinking you're going to be writing it down or saying it that I'm having the thought that X-Y-Z he is, he does not love me. Okay, you're having the thought that he does not love you. What is it about him, or what is it about him that's showing you that he does not love you? And you write it down. You write down those answers and as you write down those answers, you have to ask yourself is this the evidence? Is he really showing these things?

Tyra: 22:25

Because we can feel a certain way by what we're thinking and those are two separate things too because I can feel like somebody does not love me. I can think that somebody does not love me, but do I have the evidence that I'm not being loved? Do I have the evidence individual? Because I am curious of why or what got them feeling or what you know they are doing that has me feeling like I'm not loved. So when I go over there and I get that you know the answers, because I do have to seek the answers I'm going to seek answers by asking questions, because now I have something on paper where I have this feeling from, but I also have answers to why I'm feeling this way, so that when I go over there and talk to the individual, I'm able to ask questions.

Tyra: 23:32

And it's good to not ask questions with the why. It's good to not ask the why question, because the why question tends to make people defensive. So it's best to just use those other words the what, the where, the when and the how. Okay, so try your best not to ask the Y question, but all the other W's and that H you most definitely can use and you're asking those questions so you can get the answer to what it was that you were thinking and what it is that you are feeling. Seek answers, be more curious, but not only be more curious. Have some courage to go and seek those answers. So what can we learn from this episode? That transformation comes by changing your thoughts. All right, because if you change your thoughts, you'll change your world. So, as I conclude this episode, be kind to yourself as well as to others.